As a novelist, I tell stories and people give me money. Then financial planners tell me stories and I give them money.Martin Cruz Smith
Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?Ogden Nash
I love Rust! Rust is amazing ...if you never, ever, EVER have to look at it yourself.David Heinemeiser Hansson
How thoughtful of God to arrange matters so that, wherever you happen to be born, the local religion always turns out to be the true one.Richard Dawkins
The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he is really very good—in spite of all the people who say he is very good.Robert Graves
The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it.C. P. Snow
One idiot is one idiot. Two idiots are two idiots. Ten thousand idiots are a political party.Franz Kafka
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.Robin Williams
Christmas is the time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell government what they want and their kids pay for it.Richard Lamm
Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony.Douglas Coupland
Old age realizes the dreams of youth: look at Dean Swift; in his youth he built an asylum for the insane, in his old age he was himself an inmate.Søren Kierkegaard
It's an irony that with the physical decline of age comes more mental wellbeing. It's life's cruel trick. You've settled down as a person, you feel happier with who you are, and then you get a massive swollen prostate and have to go for a test every two weeks. It's life's way of saying the struggle isn't over.Greg Davies
This is the first age that's ever paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one.Arthur C. Clarke
The people who live in a golden age usually go around complaining how yellow everything looks.Randall Jarrell
The coming-of-age story has sort of become a joke. It's something to capitalize on, and that is painful because when you are coming of age - when you are going through something like that - the genre is so meaningful.Mae Whitman