Self-confidence comes from doing what you think is uncomfortable, over and over again, and realizing it wasn't... — David Goggins

Self-confidence comes from doing what you think is uncomfortable, over and over again, and realizing it wasn't that bad in the first place.

Author: David Goggins

Insight: Most of us think confidence is something you either have or you don't—like a personality trait you're born with. But the truth is messier and actually more hopeful: confidence builds through a specific kind of repetition. It's not about doing the same comfortable thing over and over. It's about doing the thing that makes your stomach tighten, then doing it again, and watching yourself survive it. The uncomfortable part is key. When you finally call that person back, give that presentation, or ask for what you need, your brain registers two things: you did it, and nothing catastrophic happened. Not that it went perfectly—just that you handled it. Each small survival becomes evidence to your nervous system that you're more capable than your anxiety suggests. This is why avoidance actually makes us feel worse; it teaches our brain to fear the thing more. But repetition teaches the opposite lesson. What's counterintuitive is that you don't need to wait until you feel ready or brave. You build readiness by going first. The courage doesn't precede the action—it follows from it. So that uncomfortable conversation you've been postponing? Do it now, then again next time. Not because you'll eventually love it, but because your brain will eventually stop treating it like a threat.

Source: Can't Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds, page number unknown, 2018