Sometimes, idealistic people are put off the whole business of networking as something tainted by flattery and... — Sonia Sotomayor

Sometimes, idealistic people are put off the whole business of networking as something tainted by flattery and the pursuit of selfish advantage. But virtue in obscurity is rewarded only in Heaven. To succeed in this world you have to be known to people.

Author: Sonia Sotomayor

Insight: There's a real tension here that a lot of thoughtful people feel. You want to do good work, build something genuine, help people—and then you realize that none of it matters much if nobody knows it exists. So you have to show up, talk to people, maybe even promote yourself a little. And it can feel gross, like you're betraying something. But Sotomayor's point cuts through that squeamishness: waiting for your work to speak for itself is actually a luxury, often one only certain people can afford. If you're relying on pure merit to find you, you're banking on a system that's already shown it favors people with existing connections, visibility, and access. The irony is that refusing to network because it feels icky can be its own kind of selfishness—it means your ideas, your skills, your perspective stays locked away from people who might actually need it. The real shift is reframing what networking actually is: it's not about schmoozing or faking relationships. It's about letting people know you exist and what you care about. It's visibility as a form of responsibility. You don't have to be inauthentic to be known. You just have to show up.