I wish I had gotten this advice early on in my career: Ask what you want.

The power of actually asking

Most of us move through our careers like we're trying to read someone's mind. We hint. We hope our good work speaks for itself. We wait for permission or for someone to notice we deserve more. But here's what actually happens: the people running things are usually busy, distracted, and genuinely don't know what you want unless you tell them. They can't read signals that were never sent.

The tricky part is that asking feels risky in a way it often isn't. There's a fear that wanting something openly makes you look greedy or ungrateful. But the real cost isn't social—it's that years slip by where you could have had a different title, salary, project, or opportunity. You end up resentful about a conversation that never happened. Meanwhile, the people who asked got what they wanted not because they were more talented, but because they were direct about it.

The non-obvious part: asking isn't just about getting more. It's about clarity. When you say what you actually want, something shifts. You stop guessing at what success looks like. You get feedback faster. You either move toward it or decide it wasn't worth it anyway. Either way, you stop wasting energy on vague hope.