I've come to recognize what I call my 'inside interests.' Telling stories. And helping people tell their stories is a sort of interpersonal gardening. My work at NBC News was to report the news, but in hindsight, I often tried to look for some insight to share that might spark a moment of recognition in a viewer.

Tending to what's already growing

There's something quietly radical about thinking of conversations—whether on camera or over coffee—as gardening. You're not planting seeds and walking away. You're tending to something alive in another person, the recognition that their experience matters, that their story has shape and meaning worth examining.

Most of us feel the pressure to be definitive, to have answers or take sides. But what Pauley describes is different: it's about creating space for someone to see themselves more clearly. That moment of recognition—when you hear something that makes you think "oh, that's what that feeling was called" or "I thought I was alone in this"—that's not small. It's the difference between feeling isolated and feeling understood. In a world where we're all performing versions of ourselves, whether on social media or in professional settings, the ability to hear and reflect back someone's authentic story becomes almost a radical act.

The insight extends beyond journalism. It applies to how we listen to friends, how we raise kids, how we show up in any relationship. The best conversations rarely happen when someone's trying to fix you. They happen when someone's genuinely curious about your story—not to judge it, but to help you see it more clearly yourself.