As our knees and hips and eyesight deteriorate, we become more dependable, less impulsive, kinder, and less mo... — Angela Duckworth

As our knees and hips and eyesight deteriorate, we become more dependable, less impulsive, kinder, and less moody. Psychologists call this the maturity principle. My own life experience fits this principle to a T.

Author: Angela Duckworth

Insight: There's something counterintuitive about the idea that our bodies breaking down might actually improve us as people. We tend to think of aging as pure loss—less energy, less capability, less independence. But Duckworth is pointing at something real that many people experience: when your body forces you to slow down, you often become better at the things that actually matter in relationships and work. Physical decline has a way of filtering out the noise. You can't run toward every impulse, can't dash off in anger, can't sustain the constant low-level irritability that comes from living at full throttle. There's also something humbling about needing help, about recognizing your own limits. That tends to make you more patient with other people's limitations too. The friend who snaps less often, who actually listens instead of waiting to respond, who shows up reliably—that person often has fewer options for distraction, not more. The tricky part is that this doesn't happen automatically. Some people become bitter as they age, more resentful about what they've lost. The maturity principle isn't inevitable; it's what happens when you accept the trade rather than fight it. The insight is that we might spend decades chasing physical capability when the real payoff—being someone people actually want to be around—often arrives when we finally stop running so hard.

Source: Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, p. 253, 2016