/Quotes
13 quotes

Steven Wright

born 1955

Steven Wright is an American stand-up comedian and actor known for his deadpan delivery, surreal humor, and one-liner jokes. He rose to prominence in the 1980s and is recognized for his distinctive style of comedy which often involves absurd, philosophical observations on everyday life.

  1. If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving isn’t for you.

    Steven Wright
    #skydiving#failure#perseverance

  2. I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

    Steven Wright
    #map#existence#identity

  3. Black holes are where God divided by zero.

    Steven Wright
    #black holes#infinity#mystery

  4. You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?

    Steven Wright
    #having#limits#perspective

  5. How young can you die of old age?

    Steven Wright
    #age#mortality#reflection

  6. Good jokes are gems. A good idea is hard to come by. I couldn't give them to someone else, even for money. It just wouldn't seem right.

    Steven Wright
    #gems#creativity#integrity

  7. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

    Steven Wright
    #experience#timing#wisdom

  8. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

    Steven Wright
    #conscience#memory#truth

  9. When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.

    Steven Wright
    #body#science#legacy

  10. Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

    Steven Wright
    #distance#time#perspective

  11. I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

    Steven Wright
    #dictionary#poetry#imagination

  12. I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

    Steven Wright
    #breakfast#humor#creativity

  13. What's another word for Thesaurus?

    Steven Wright
    #thesaurus#language#humor